International Pronouns Day

Pronouns are an essential part of our daily language, they are how we address ourselves and our peers, creating our identity. Understanding and learning a person’s pronoun is a way to show you acknowledge their identity and respect who they are. In theory, this should be simple, and respecting a person’s identity should not be viewed as taboo, but sadly despite more open conversations on the matter, there is still some confusion and hesitation regarding pronouns.

Like most social topics in life, one of the best ways to foster learning and understanding is by talking about the subject openly. In order to celebrate International Pronouns Day and keep the conversation moving forward, Beth Warman, an advocate for the use and respect of pronouns looks at the reasons why the use of pronouns is so important.

Corporate Responsibility and Sustainability Apprenticeship Learning Coach, Dr Beth Warman.

Identity is so important, isn’t it? It can mean a lot when someone you met once remembers your name, the date of your birthday, or even your coffee order. We all have those things that make us ‘us’; and it is important that others know those things that make us ‘us’ and respect them. Pronouns are among those things that make us ‘us’.

Everyone has them. It’s who we are and how we like to be referred to. Pronouns communicate something about our identities. They’re not “preferred” as they sometimes might be called. They are the language that people can use to refer to us that says something about who we are. My pronouns are they/she. For me, that means that I am happy being referred to as either “they” or “she”.”

Your pronouns might be he/him, or she/her, or they/them, or he/they. This communicates something about who you are. This is regardless of whether you identify with the gender that you were assigned at birth (known as being cisgender) or not (known as being transgender). In any instance, when someone uses the wrong pronouns when talking about you, it can feel strange, can’t it? I know that I don’t like to be referred to as “he” – that just doesn’t sit right. I imagine you might feel the same when someone doesn’t use your correct pronouns.

International Pronouns Day is an excellent time to reflect on this and to acknowledge that everyone has pronouns. Yet, they seem to be such a significant conversation, particularly in the last few years. Why?

Many more people have the language now to communicate who they are. Many more people are able to hear stories about others’ experiences through Equality, Diversity, and Inclusion training in the workplace and on social media, which can help them to realise that they have similar experiences and, in turn, learn things about themselves.

For some people, pronouns are a significant part of their identity and their lives. These can be people who have struggled with their identities for a long time or those raised in a way that did not align with who they were. For these people, pronouns might be something that is extremely important to them. 

For many, they are simply another thing that makes us ‘us’.

What can we do, then, as companies and individuals to acknowledge one another’s identities in a way that respects everyone’s experiences?

Normalising sharing pronouns is a great start. Normalising inclusive language in your workplace and everyday life creates an environment where people feel comfortable being themselves and sharing that with others.

Here are a few ways we can achieve this:

• Share your pronouns when introducing yourself to others
• Include your pronouns in your email signature
• Include your pronouns in your social media accounts, including LinkedIn
• Ask others what their pronouns are
• Respect when someone might not feel comfortable talking about their pronouns as they may not feel safe to do so
• Advocate for these actions to be common practice in your workplace, but make it clear that they are voluntary
• Remember that respect doesn’t require understanding (you don’t have to know what it’s like to walk in someone’s shoes to be able to respect them and their identity)

In a world where working remotely has become commonplace, these actions can be particularly important, as it can be easy to assume who someone is, based on the name that they use to sign off their email, or the way that they present themselves in an online call. Normalising sharing pronouns can help to stop us from assuming and allow us to know and respect one another.

Does your company encourage any of these actions? Is there an opportunity for you to promote conversations around pronouns?

Today could be a good time for you to ask those questions and reflect on what you can do to show your colleagues, friends, family, and strangers that you respect them for who they are.

Acknowledging someone’s pronouns goes a long way toward making someone feel seen, heard, and valued. There are many resources to check out if you are still unsure of how to approach the subject best, so be sure to follow the link https://pronouns.org/